5 Step Process To Improve A Child’s Emotional Intelligence
- 3m guru
- Jun 30, 2022
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Emotional intelligence is clearly important for interpersonal relationships and leadership development, but how to improve it? The way your child manages emotions can have an impact on everything from his or her relationships with classmates to performance in the classroom.
Benefits of EQ for students
Students derive a lot of benefits from emotional intelligence. They are as follows:
When a student has a good EQ score, he/she can cope better in this competitive world. Students can endure tough circumstances using emotional intelligence. They can adjust to people with different nature and temperament which is critical for success. And most importantly, they can manage their emotions and take practical decisions anytime.
We all have to go through different negative emotions and feelings like anger, anxiety, fear, jealousy, happiness, sadness, and others. These negative emotions hinder effective communication. For example, too much anxiety before public speaking will make us jittery, and mess up our memory. So, one should know when to be emotional and when to hold them back, especially when they are students. Better management of emotions will help them improve their linguistic skills and express their views and ideas without hesitation.
Build new relations
When you learn to manage your emotions, you can build new relations in a better way. You can blend well with new friends and adapt to a new environment. Students can exchange their thoughts with one another and take or give help in their academic field.
Reduction in stress
Adults alone are not victims of stress. Students also face significant stress at school and college. Stress can ruin you completely and it is the biggest hurdle to do something new. Emotional intelligence will help the students to manage stress and study smartly even in difficult times. EQ will help them, particularly during important exams when they undergo too much stress.
Empathize with fellow students
Emotional Intelligence will help the students empathize with other students. They can understand different points of views, put them in the other person’s shoes, and solve their problems. EQ will make them mature as good person and set a perfect example for other students in the school, college, and universities.
How to build EQ in your child? Find 5 easy steps below.
- 1. Name the emotion
Whenever children are undergoing a highly charged emotional state, help them name the emotion (anger, happiness, sadness, frustration). This will make them become aware of what they are undergoing. Becoming aware is the first step in overcoming. For example they can state “I am feeling angry” . This will help them be conscious of the emotion, acknowledge that the emotion is not a part of them, and it is just how they feel at the moment.
- 2. Discuss the feelings
The second step is to ask how this situation has made them feel and why. Help children overcome a negative feeling by discussing with them about it. Once they bring awareness to their emotion, now it is time to deal with it.
- 3. Empathize
Children like adults are scared of being judged. It is important that your child knows that you understand what he or she is feeling. They have to believe that you are genuinely trying to help, and they can be open to you as a parent. Try saying, "It sounds like you're excited!" or "You seem frustrated right now". Talk about how your child is feeling, as this is critical in building trust, and know that you are on their side.
- 4. Teach problem-solving
Next step is to help your child reflect on his or her emotions to identify what makes him or her feel a certain way. Find solutions to any challenges together. Rationalizing the feeling by giving it reasons, and sharing it with a person like a parent whom they trust, helps separate the problem from the person. This makes it easy to deal with the problem.
- 5. Lead by example
The final step is to communicate with your child about the solution. Opening up about your own feelings, the reasons behind those feelings and how you deal with it will help bridge gaps between you and your child. Give them examples of how you have undergone similar circumstances in life, and how you approached positively to get out of them. This will make them realize that they too can handle their emotional state positively.
Lets sum up…
We as parents are tempted to be judgemental about our children’s behaviour. Behaviour is driven by a child’s emotional state. We tend to give them names like “you are disobedient”, “you don’t behave”, “you are selfish”, etc . We don’t see a child and his emotions as separate entities.
Or, in such instances we are tempted to sit down and advice on what’s right and wrong. But strong emotions are like tidal waves. How can someone make sense of logic when they are swept by a wave, and are trying to stay afloat?
The ideal approach in such circumstances would be to first pull them out of that strong emotional tide. Then build trust and make them believe that you or on their side. Finally, work on the solutions with them, by sharing your own experiences. Remember ‘children follow the actions of people whom they trust’.
This is the five step process that you can start trying right away. If you stick with this for a long time, you can bring up a child with a high EQ.
This article is presented by 3mguru, a self discovery platform for kids to learn foundational skills, emotional skills, develop relevant values and map their skills with a live global ranking system.